Meet The World’s Biggest Pussy

 

If you’ve been following the news since the Islamic terrorist attack in Orlando, Florida, you probably thought I was going to point the finger at our spineless, traitorous President. And to be perfectly honest, he’s probably more deserving of the title…all things considered. But when it comes to the guy who gave me the deepest, most profoundly felt douche chills, the title of The World’s Biggest Pussy clearly belongs to Gersh Kuntzman (his real name), a writer for the Daily News in New York.

 

punchface
Gersh Kuntzman. “Here’s me totally laughing naturally in my Prius!” What a twat.

 

Miss Kuntzman wrote about his recent experience shooting the big, bad, super-duper scary AR-15. And it might just be the most embarrassing thing I’ve ever read in my life. The heights of dramatic exaggeration that this sissy bitch reaches are so incredibly nauseating and pathetic. Did he think only uneducated, loony liberal gunophobes would read his silly drivel? Obviously his standard reader demographic. Someone should probably explain the internet to this jackass.

 

pussygun
This is a man who cries while reading romance novels in his pedicurist’s chair.

 

Kuntzman reminds me of that idiot in junior high who always made up stories about how he got laid over the Summer break. We all knew he was full of shit, but he’s just this awkward, harmless, hyperactive dork who’s too stupid to realize that everyone listening to him knows that he’s full of shit. Kuntzman just managed to figure out a way to make a living at it.

 

So here’s his article in it’s entirety. Printed without permission, and no link provided to his original article. Fuck him.

 

It felt to me like a bazooka — and sounded like a cannon.

One day after 49 people were killed in the Orlando shooting, I traveled to Philadelphia to better understand the firepower of military-style weapons and, hopefully, explain their appeal to gun lovers.

But mostly, I was just terrified.

Many gun shops turned down our request to fire and discuss the AR-15, a style of semi-automatic rifle popular with mass killers such as San Bernardino terrorist Syed Farook and similar in capabilities to the Sig Sauer MCX rifle used by Orlando terrorist Omar Mateen.

But Frank Stelmach of Double Tap Shooting Range and Gun Shop invited me, videographer Michael Sheridan and reporter Adam Shrier to come down. Stelmach is not like many gun lovers. He admires his weaponry, yes, and has difficulty explaining why law-abiding citizens need a gun that can empty a 40-round magazine in a few seconds. But he also hates the idea that “bad people” get a hold of a gun like this and use it to kill without difficulty.

“There should be expanded background checks — extending into your family, friends and associates,” he said. “And there should be a mental health screening. In Europe, if you want to buy a gun, you have to see a doctor (for a psychiatric examination) to see if something’s not right.”

Stelmach, who opened his shop six years ago after a career in law enforcement in Europe, also said he never sells a gun to someone who “looks a little bit funny,” and he claimed he had prevented many guns from getting into the wrong hands because the would-be purchaser “asked stupid questions” like, “What happens to me if the gun is stolen?”

But very few gun shop owners do anything close to Stelmach’s sniff test — and he acknowledged how easy it is to find another gun shop owner willing to make the sale.

Very easy. In fact, as Philadelphia Daily News columnist Helen Ubinas showed today, you can get a military-styled weapon in seven minutes in this country.


 

20150612-Helen-AR-15-gun
Helen Ubinas and her newly acquired AR-15. Helen and Gersh would make a great couple.
With Helen playing the traditional male provider and protector role in the
relationship, of course. Gersh could wear a dress.

 

Stelmach doesn’t think it should be easy. But he thinks it should be allowed. “Guns don’t kill people. The wrong people kill people,” Stelmach added. “We can’t blame the weapon.”

He loves the AR-15 for cops, soldiers, hunters and target shooters. “It’s fun to shoot something like that,” he said.

Not in my hands. I’ve shot pistols before, but never something like an AR-15. Squeeze lightly on the trigger and the resulting explosion of firepower is humbling and deafening (even with ear protection).

The recoil bruised my shoulder, which can happen if you don’t know what you’re doing. The brass shell casings disoriented me as they flew past my face. The smell of sulfur and destruction made me sick. The explosions — loud like a bomb — gave me a temporary form of PTSD. For at least an hour after firing the gun just a few times, I was anxious and irritable.

 

girlar15 - Copy
The little girl shooting the AR-15 in this photo must be too high on PCP to feel the violent
recoil and smell the sickening destruction.

 

Even in semi-automatic mode, it is very simple to squeeze off two dozen rounds before you even know what has happened. If illegally modified to fully automatic mode, it doesn’t take any imagination to see dozens of bodies falling in front of your barrel.

All it takes is the will to do it.

Forty nine people can be gone in 60 seconds.

 

 

What a giant load of horseshit.

He would have felt very little recoil with that gun. Disorientating brass shell casings flying past his face? It didn’t happen. The smell of sulfur? Nope. Deafeningly loud (like a bomb!), even with ear protection? A totally absurd lie. It gave him a “temporary form of PTSD?” I’d like to pistol-whip him.

Look, I understand. I really do. Guns are incredibly scary to the majority of people with no experience handling them. And there are a lot of crazy assholes out there who use them to do really fucking horrible things. I get it!

But you are not going to wish away the violent actions of a relatively small number of violent lunatics by allowing yourself to be spoon-fed the usual false info hysterics that are constantly being perpetuated by an increasingly irresponsible media. Their never-ending quest to exploit the latest gun-related tragedy in America is driven by no other reason but to sell add space. This kind of shit is poorly produced infotainment for the tragically uninformed and easily excitable.

Gersh Kuntzman and his fear-mongering media huckster cohorts are in the lie business, and business is good.

An AR-15 didn’t walk into that club and shoot all those innocent people. And regardless of the intimidating look of the AR-15, there is not a single thing about them that should cause any particular alarm with people. All guns are dangerous in the wrong hands, dummy. And there are over 300 million of them. Over 5 million people own an AR-15 in this country. Yes, FIVE MILLION.

There’s not an AR-15 problem in America, there’s a crazy assholes problem in America.

And those crazy assholes will always find the tools necessary to inflict as much damage as possible.

No gun law, politician, weepy fourth-rate journalist, cop, or even a miracle from the baby Jesus himself is going to stop them.

So stop wasting your time with all this childish anti-gun nonsense, and go do something that will actually help increase your odds of survival in one of these violent situations.

Your personal safety is YOUR responsibility, so grow the fuck up and do something about it.

 

momar15
My 70-year-old mom.

 

 

 

 

Like what you see going on here?
Buy Mitchell Boone a beer!

                                                           
Posted in COLD HARD TRUTH

Leave a Reply